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Al-Nassr v Al-Khaleej, Monday 8th May 2023, 7pm

May 21, 2023

So many of the games here seem to start around 9pm. That’s understandable given the heat, but it makes for a very late evening, particularly when there’s a post-match taxi ride involved. This one had a much more sociable kick-off time of 7pm, although the trade-off was the forty degree heat. The initial ticket frenzy that had greeted Ronaldo’s arrival had long gone and so despite some rush hour traffic I was able to get to the Mrsool Stadium in about forty minutes.

My season ticket entitles me to enter by a gate without a body scanner and avoid being searched. As you can buy diet coke inside the stadium it’s a notional benefit only, but I like the idea that if you have a season ticket you can be trusted not to bring anything untoward into the ground with you.

Mind you, I don’t obey all of the stadium rules. I was walking around the concourse and noticed that one of the stairways had no stewards checking tickets. I’m always interested in watching games from different viewpoints and so I made my way in and found a seat in a fairly empty section. I was at the other end of the ground to where I normally sit, high up behind a small group of around sixty away fans who had taken up positions down at the front.

The fixture was more meaningful than some I’ve been to recently. League leaders Al-Ittihad had lost their last match and so a home win would allow Al-Nassr to draw level with them at the top, albeit having played a game more. Visitors Al-Khaleej were third from bottom with just two points separating them from the two-team relegation zone. Even a point would be a great outcome for them.

Al-Khaleej made an early impact, clattering Ronaldo in the opening moments and then going a goal up after only three minutes.

Al-Nassr equalized on the quarter hour but rarely played with any conviction. Al-Khaleej’s timewasting stopped them getting into any sort of rhythm and Ronaldo got more and more pissed off as the evening went on. He had a couple of efforts disallowed and even nine minutes of added time at the end wasn’t sufficient for them to nick a win.

The away fans in front of me celebrated their point, which may very well be vital come the end of the season, whilst the two points dropped meant that most Al-Nassr fans were on their way home long before the players had left the pitch.

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Al-Shabab v Al-Fateh, Wednesday 3rd May 2023, 9.30pm

May 20, 2023

This was a fairly meaningless end of season fixture. Al-Shabab were in third place in the table but nine points behind leaders Al-Ittihad and the games remaining were quickly running out. There’s only one Champions League spot available, although I suppose if second placed Al-Nassr imploded then Al-Shabab might qualify for the next level down Asian competition. Visitors Al-Fateh were fifth but well adrift from the top four.

The walk to the Prince Faisal bin Fahd ground took me around the perimeter of King Abdullah Park. There’s a significant cat population in the area and they are well fed by the locals. I saw one woman dragging what looked like a fifteen-kilogram bag of food about with her. There are always plenty of kittens too and with no pressure on any of them to catch their own dinner I imagine a far larger proportion of them reach adulthood than in other areas of town.

I passed the ticket office on the way around to my entrance gate and noticed that it was open. There were three fellas inside and they had printed tickets on A4 paper presumably prepared ready for people who were struggling to buy online.

I’d already sorted my seat and for a very reasonably ten riyals, which equated to two pounds and eighteen pence. I was in Block 201 which was formerly the family area and is in the covered stand, right next to the VIP section. There was a Perspex screen to make sure that I didn’t stray into the posh bit. Despite the bargain ticket price there was a very small crowd, probably in the hundreds rather than thousands. I didn’t see any away fans but it’s a three-hour drive from Al-Hasa and with such a late kick-off I doubt many would have fancied that sort of round trip.

I hadn’t been too sure about attending either. Partly because it wouldn’t finish until getting on for half past eleven, but mainly because I’ve just started watching the Get Back documentary. It’s an astonishingly good piece of work and looks like it could have been filmed yesterday rather than fifty-odd years ago. I’d happily watch the full sixty hours of footage if it’s ever made available. In the end though I decided that I could eke it out and go to the match instead.

The game was half-paced with little urgency. Neither team put much venom into their shots or tackles and it had nil-nil written all over it. One decent effort was always likely to be enough and a well-taken Al-Shabab free-kick early in the second half was enough to seal the win.

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Al-Hilal v Urawa Red Diamonds, Saturday 29th April 2023, 8pm

May 19, 2023

Whilst Al-Hilal have had a poor league campaign by their standards, they’ve done ok in the cups and have reached three finals. This game was the first leg of the Asian Champions League Final and in order to accommodate the demand for tickets the venue had been switched from the Prince Faisal bin Fahd stadium near to where I stay to the much larger King Fahd stadium twenty kilometres or so away.

In one way I was surprised by the demand. Most of the Al-Hilal games that I’ve attended this season have had crowds of around four thousand. It’s been a bit like Ayresome Park in that second Bobby Murdoch season. However, they are the most successful team in Saudi Arabia and so they will have a lot of fans who turn up once a year, no doubt proclaiming their absolute loyalty.

Perhaps some of my interest in the sudden increase in Al-Hilal fans attending games was because I’d struggled for a ticket, despite being one of the four thousand that regularly turned up this season at the Prince Faisal ground. I’d managed to get a last-minute ticket due to the helpfulness of three young lads at the Al-Nassr game the previous night who were able to find one that may have just been released from someone’s online basket.

As the ticket required the use of an animated QR code, linked to the ticket holder’s account, they also very kindly sent me a video of it as a screenshot wasn’t sufficient.

I was in the stadium with an hour to spare and it was just as well as it was already half-full. There were plenty of seats available lower down, but these required you to watch through a fence and with a running track between the stands and the pitch a view from high up is a better option. I took a seat in the very back row with some friendly Al-Hilal fans. They gave me a mint tea, some water and even a twix. I felt a bit guilty that I had nothing to offer in return other than a slagging off of Al-Nassr, which was very well received.

We were close to the away fans and they were magnificent, as Stevie Mac would say, with non-stop singing and flag waving. I reckon they must only be allowed to travel if they are prepared to put the effort in. Mind you, the home fans did well too, with a pre-match tifo display involving plastic bags. By the time everyone was in, the attendance had exceeded fifty thousand and people were sitting on the steps between sections.

Al-Hilal had the ball throughout most of the game with Urawa relying on counter-attacks. The pressure paid off early on and they went in front on the quarter hour. They should have made it two fifteen minutes later but the chance was squandered. Urawa equalized early in the second half after a sliding interception from a defender sent the ball past his own goalie and then back off the post, with the rebound tucked away.

That was it for goals, but we had some late drama when an Al-Hilal player was sent off for booting a bloke who had fouled him. Both teams had pretty much settled for a draw at that point anyway, leaving it all to play for in the second leg.

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Al-Nassr v Al-Raed, Friday 28th April 2023, 9.30pm

May 18, 2023

After the trip to Europe I was back in the Middle East with another fixture involving Ronaldo’s team Al-Nassr. The assumption when he signed was that he would elevate the club to another level, but the reality has been that they’ve slipped from the top of the table to a position where the title is now out of their hands.

There was speculation in the media this week that Ronaldo might retire and take up an ambassadorial role with Real Madrid. I couldn’t see that happening whilst he still believes that he’s good enough to lead the line for them. I doubt the Al-Nassr chairman would shed too many tears if Ronaldo were to walk away from his contract though, as he was quoted saying that he’d only been ripped off twice in his life, firstly when he ordered three kebabs and only two were delivered and secondly, when he signed Ronaldo. I felt his pain. Nobody should ever be a kebab short.

I took a taxi to Mrsool stadium arriving a couple of hours early to avoid the jams. There’s decent wifi though so it wasn’t much of a hardship. The taxi driver was keen to wait for me coming out afterwards, four hours later, so either business is slow at the moment or else I’m paying too much.

I’d noticed quite a few Japanese fellas in the concourse, some of them wearing the shirts of Urawa Red Diamonds. They were presumably in town for the Asian Champions League Final the following day and had taken the opportunity to watch another game whilst here. I like that. I discussed Al-Hilal’s prospects in that game with a couple of blokes selling coffee and they were fairly bullish about the Saudi team’s chances. I wasn’t quite so sure as I’ve seen some poor performances from them over the season. Maybe they can lift their game when it matters.

I’d tried to get a ticket for that final, but it appeared to be sold out. However, there were three young lads sat in front of me and one of them mentioned that he was an Al-Hilal fan. He seemed to have buying privileges that I didn’t and so he bought me a ticket and transferred it via WhatsApp. Technology, eh. The only downside of the transaction was that whilst we were arsing about with the phones, I missed the opening goal. Ronaldo providing the perfect retort to his chairman five minutes into the game.

In a way though, I could see the chairman’s point. Ronaldo had a decent game but too many of his team-mates weren’t on the same wavelength and often didn’t anticipate what would have been a killer pass or notice until it was too late that he’d made the perfect run behind a defender. The three million quid a week spent on his wages would probably have been better spent paying six foreign players half a million quid each. You’d still pretty much get your pick of the Premier League for that sort of money, particularly as it’s tax-free.

Anyway, Al-Nassr added a second early on in the second half and then two more in stoppage time. Four-nil flattered them to a certain extent, but they deserved their victory.

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Middlesbrough v Hull City, Wednesday 19th April 2023, 8pm

May 17, 2023

Whilst out in Spain I’d missed seeing the Boro tonk Norwich five-one in a game that was over by half-time. Harry reckoned that we weren’t remotely flattered by the scoreline and that we had eased off once the points were in the bag. With us in that sort of form I had high hopes of something similar against Hull.

This was another evening game selected by Sky and so we had a slightly later than usual kick-off time of 8pm. Riley McGree was absent injured and so Hayden Hackney got the chance to play further forward. I thought he did well, invariably looking for the adventurous option and was unlucky to only hit the post in the first half. He’s another fella who has had a great season and to think that he wasn’t even in contention for a first team spot until Leo was given the caretaker’s job.

Despite us being on top, it was Hull who took the lead just before the break with a header after a corner. We sometimes seem vulnerable at set pieces, but I wasn’t too concerned as it just looked to be a matter of time before we clicked. The injury list was worsening though with Forss and Smith staying in the dressing room as the teams emerged for the second half, giving opportunities to Dijksteel and Jones to show they deserved starting places.

And click we certainly did. Three goals in six minutes as we approached the hour took the game away from Hull. The third meant that Akpom had scored in nine consecutive home games which was a record of some sort and also his twenty-ninth of the season. The tally matched his shirt number and he ripped it off, twirled it about a bit and gave Carrick a hug.

The win confirmed our play-off spot with three games still to play. Not a bad position to be in.

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Bruno’s Magpies v Europa FC, Sunday 16th April 2023, 4pm

May 16, 2023

After the game in Estepona, Jen and I continued south for a further three-quarters of an hour to the Gibraltar border. I’d read up a little on the easiest way to get in and the consensus was that it was best to park on the Spanish side and walk the couple of hundred yards to the immigration and customs posts. So that’s what we did.

It was all very straightforward, although it did mean that I’d pick up four Spanish entry/exit stamps in the space of a week. At that rate my new passport will be full in a year. Once into Gibraltar, we caught a bus, notionally to the town centre, but in reality just a couple of stops to the Victoria Stadium. Jen paid the fares with a tenner that she had and was given the change in euros. All wonderfully flexible but I suspect something that is likely to boil the piss of the flagshaggers.

We had time for a traditional Sunday lunch at Bruno’s in the harbour area. Were it not for the weather and the multi-million-pound yachts we could have been at Hartlepool Marina.  There wasn’t time for dessert if we were to make the kick-off and so we headed back towards the ground. Nobody was collecting any gate money and we went straight into the covered stand where there were around a hundred or so other people sat around, mostly family or friends of the players.

The stadium has a five-thousand capacity, with stands on each of the long sides and an artificial pitch. The main feature though is the Rock, which provides a suitably scenic background. If they still have monkeys living on it, then they kept a low profile as we didn’t see a single one.

One of the odder features of the ground is that it’s the venue for every fixture in the Gibraltar Premier League. Bizarre, really. I know space is tight but there are other grounds in the territory and if crowds of a hundred or so are typical then why not add some variety?

This game features Bruno’s Magpies, perhaps sponsored by the place where we’d had lunch, and Europa FC. The Magpies were in green and black and Europa in what Jen assured me was teal and grey.

It seemed like quite a critical game, with the winners moving into pole position for a spot in the very early qualifying rounds of the newish UEFA Conference competition. Europa went in front after ten minutes before a well-worked move from Magpies was finished with a back-heel to level the score.

At half-time we moved to the stand opposite for a different view. We didn’t stay until the end though as we had a two-hour plus drive back to Alora and I think I’d gained as much enjoyment out of the trip as I was going to. The main highlight, I suppose, was ticking off country number fifty-four where I’d seen a game. I’d like to make it sixty before my sixtieth birthday in a year and a half’s time, so six more to go.

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CD Estepona v CD Diocesano, Sunday 16th April 2023, 12 noon

May 15, 2023

Having ticked off Antequero’s ground the previous day, I had a few options remaining for the Sunday which was a much busier day fixture-wise. Unfortunately, nearby Alora didn’t have a home game as it’s an interesting town. I’d braved the streets that were barely narrower than our car to visit their castle and we were able to view the surrounding area in all directions.

I wasn’t able to see the hillside on which we were staying as there was another hill between us. Without the hill I’d have been confident of spotting the brightly coloured vintage circus wagon that we’d booked. In an area where just about every house was white, it certainly stood out.

There were games taking place in Malaga which was less than an hour’s drive away, but when I discovered that there was a fixture in Gibraltar I couldn’t resist adding another country to my groundhopping list. The late afternoon kickoff time also meant that we could squeeze in a lunchtime game on the way, although I don’t suppose many Spaniards would consider noon to be an appropriate time for lunch. That meant our first stop of the day was Estepona, a coastal town about ninety minutes south.

The ninety minutes quickly turned into two hours after I realized that I’d forgotten the passports that we’d need to cross the border between Spain and Gibraltar and had to double back. We had plenty of time in hand though and if there had been a vacant table at any of the cafes near the Estadio Municipal Francisco Munoz then we could have had a pre-match second breakfast.

There was a short queue for fifteen euro tickets for a game that would impact upon both ends of their fourth-tier league table. Home side Estepona, in a very Spanish red and blue kit, were in seventh place and two points outside of the play-off spots. Visitors Diocesano, in blue and green, were eighteenth and bottom, although still not mathematically down.

The pitch was artificial with yellow markings for other sports or for five a side games. That sort of thing always strikes me as a bit small-time. I know they have to maximize use and revenue but aesthetically I’d rather it didn’t happen.

We found seats at the back of the reasonably full main shaded stand and so got the benefit of the wind blowing in. There were some black shirted ultras behind the goal to our left and a handful of people sat in the sun in the open stand opposite.

There weren’t many chances until the closing stages and, if you didn’t know, it would have been hard to say which team was propping up the table. Estepona put some pressure on towards the end but couldn’t take their opportunities. Two minutes from time a shot that might actually have been a cross sneaked in and the single goal was sufficient to take the points for Diocesano.

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Antequero v Yeclano Desportivo, Saturday 15th April 2023, 6pm

May 14, 2023

Our week in Spain was mainly spent in the hills between Alora and Antequero. One evening we heard what sounded like wolves howling. I googled ‘wolves in Andalucía’ and learned that there are indeed wolf packs living wild in the region. Pretty good, eh? Some people aren’t keen on wolves, but I reckon that they are just like dogs and I’ve yet to meet a dog that didn’t get on with me. You just give them a treat and ruffle their fur a bit.

My Google search also revealed that there was a wolf park a few kilometres away in the direction of Antequero. We went along and had a look, although there was no fur ruffling allowed. The lady who showed us around confirmed that, if the winds are right, their nocturnal howling can be heard in the area that we were staying. The news came as a disappointment, as I was hoping that I’d see one walking past our cabin in the hope of being fed some sausages.

Anyway, we were back in the same area the next day for some football. It was a fourth-tier game between Antequero and Yeclano Desportivo. The hosts were fourteen points clear at the top of the table with just five games remaining and a win would clinch both promotion and the title. I learned from their website that they were expecting a sell-out and with the ticket office and ground opening an hour and a half before kick-off, we got there early.

There was already a lengthy queue when we arrived, but we were soon able to buy ten euro tickets for the uncovered stand. I turned down the option of a pig’s leg raffle ticket on the basis that with no wolves likely to pass our door Jen and I would have to consume the whole limb ourselves in the three days we had remaining.

El Mauli stadium holds seven thousand and quickly filled up. I suspect that a lot of the crowd weren’t any more regular attendees than we were, but were drawn in by the chance of being part of their team’s history and to catch up with old friends from their match-going days. There was a definite buzz about the place, but very little tension which is just as you’d expect when your team needs only a single point from their remaining five games. It wasn’t Leicester ’88.

Yeclano weren’t there to make up the numbers though, as they were in third place in the table with promotion hopes of their own, albeit via the play-offs. They had brought six fans with them and as many banners as well as a drum and a loudhailer. It was a friendly atmosphere though with no segregation and genuine banter between both sets of fans. The only involvement that the police had was to request that the Yeclano banners be moved so that they didn’t obscure some advertising hoardings.

Antequero were in green and white halves with black shorts and socks, with Yeclano in a sort of knock-off Milan kit. The first half was cagey with few chances apart from one home attack that required an impressive triple save from the visiting keeper.

The deadlock was broken by Antequero a few minutes into the second half, but Yeclano weren’t out of it and always looked to have a goal in them. It meant that the Cava remained on ice until a couple of minutes from time when a second home goal signalled the start of the festivities. It wasn’t my party and so on the final whistle I left them to it. As we drove away, we had to pause to allow an open topped bus to enter the stadium. Clearly it was going to be some evening.

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Santa Rosaria Women v Stockholm Women, Thursday 13th April 2023, 5.15pm

May 13, 2023

Jen and I had decided to have a week in Spain and flew into Malaga. We were staying up in the hills about an hour inland, but on this particular day it was a bit too warm for going for a walk. Instead, we headed to the seaside town of Fuengirola with a plan to stroll along the seafront, ideally with the odd shaded section.

I wasn’t too impressed with what we saw of Fuengirola or the seafront and a couple of hours later with the necessary ten thousand steps in the bank we made our way back to where we were staying. When passing Cartama, Jen spotted a game going on in a stadium below the motorway. There was a handy exit and so I pulled off to have a look.

The game was at the Ciudad Deportiva de Cartama, home of CD Cartama. It had a main covered stand but no facilities for spectators on the other three sides of the pitch. There was a running track and it looked as if the place was geared up primarily for track and field rather than football. We took a seat in the main stand alongside fifteen or so other people.

A nearby fella filled me in. It was a women’s game between a local side from Santa Rosario and a team from Stockholm that were on a tour of the area. The Swedes, in navy, looked the better side but the Spanish women, in white and green, were holding their own at nil-nil.

We had plans, so didn’t watch for too long before heading off.

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Tadcaster Albion v Bridlington Town, Monday 10th April 2023, 3.10pm

May 12, 2023

I’d thought about going down to Ashton Gate for the Boro game, but it has been switched to a tea-time kick-off and the thought of travelling back to Teesside from Bristol afterwards on a Bank Holiday Monday was sufficient for me not to think about it too seriously. Instead, I drove down to Tadcaster for a match in the eighth tier Northern Premier League Division One East. I’ve been to a few grounds in this division as it’s where teams that are promoted from the Northern League tend to find themselves.

Tadcaster is great as it has that brewery smell of mashing grains and boiling wart. Or at least the area around their Ings Lane ground does. The John Smith’s brewery provides the backdrop to the pitch and whilst I’ll only drink a pint of Smooth if it’s pretty much my only option, I’m happy to inhale the production aroma all day long.

It was nine quid in, which is about par for this level and I called into the clubhouse for a chip butty that led to a conversation with the girl behind the counter about the respective merits of ‘spread’ ‘spreadable butter’ and ‘butter’. We agreed that ‘spread’ is the least desirable of the three, yet that was exactly what I got. The chips were good though and, with heavy drizzle coming down, I took the butty and a coffee to the covered stand behind the goal at the brewery end.

There was a ten-minute delay to the kick-off as an elderly lino, who perhaps hadn’t warmed up as thoroughly as he might have done, pulled a leg muscle when over-vigorously checking the goal net for holes. One of the away staff was roped in for flag duties. I’d have thought that there would be a fourth official at this level and maybe there was. Perhaps his duties were considered more difficult to fill than running the line.

I found myself sitting behind the Bridlington coach driver and he filled me in on the respective merits of the teams. That was two conversations with strangers in the space of ten minutes. Maybe I’m getting more sociable these days. He told me that Tadcaster were bottom of the league and already relegated, with Bridlington destined for mid-table whatever happened. Perhaps this was why everyone was happy to go ahead with a replacement linesman.

It was an excellent match. Tadcaster went a goal up early on and then doubled their lead midway through the first half. Bridlington had plenty of chances though and kept the pressure on, pulling one back from the penalty spot fifteen minutes from time. Tadcaster finally cracked in the final minute and conceded from a header lofted into a crowded box. For a nothing game, there was far more emotion than you’d imagine with the home players slumped to the floor and Bridlington celebrating as if they had done far more than nicked a point against the side propping up the table.

That wasn’t everything though. As Bridlington pushed for the winner in added time that they clearly thought was on the cards, Tadcaster broke free and the ball was squared to their Polish striker who finished it off to clinch the win. It was now the turn of the Bridlington players to drop to their knees and for Tadcaster to celebrate as if they’d been promoted.

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