Buffaloes v United Stars, Sunday 15th February 2015, 10.30am

March 11, 2015

1-P1210107

One week on from the matches in Windhoek, we caught our next Namibian game over on the east coast in Swakopmund. We’d travelled a fair distance in that time, driving south to Fish River Canyon, then across to Luderitz, then back up to Walvis Bay via Sossuslvei  on the east coast.

Fish River Canyon was spectacular. We stayed on the edge and were able to hike along the top in the early morning before it got too hot. We were also driven down to the bottom where the lack of rain meant that the river had dried to no more than a number of rock pools. The fish that were concentrated within these were happy to share our crisps with us.

We were over a hundred kilometres  from the nearest town and with the lack of artificial light it’s the best place I’ve been for looking at the stars.

Fish River Canyon

Fish River Canyon

After the canyon we headed west to the port town of Luderitz. Whilst the drive through the desert was impressive, Luderitz itself was less so. It was windy with not a lot going on, although we did drive past a ‘ghost town’ where an abandoned mining settlement had been left to the encroaching sand dunes.

Part of the ghost town.

Part of the ghost town.

From Luderitz we drove a few hours north to Sossuslvei to see some even bigger sand dunes. We arrived in the evening and went straight out into the desert where the highlight was spotting a couple of jackals.

He blends in pretty well.

He blends in pretty well.

Next morning we were up at four to watch the sun come up over the dunes. We stayed away from the organised tour and after parking up ignored the paths and just wandered off by ourselves. We climbed a couple of dunes, pausing to look at the tracks. Sometimes you’d see where a mouse had crossed the path of a lizard, sometimes a bird had brought the evidence of it having been there to an end by taking off.

There were bigger tracks too of various boks and what was probably a jackal. Maybe one of the ones that we’d seen the previous evening.

Early morning.

Early morning.

Walking down the sand dunes was much more fun than going up as you could sink your feet in a few inches and just let the shifting sand carry you down.

Still early morning.

Still early morning.

An hour or so after sunrise it was already too hot for wandering around and having left our tracks for the next visitor we resumed our journey north.

The next stop was Walvis Bay. It was ok, but nothing special compared with Sossuslvei. It had a few thousand flamingos which are always good for a bit of entertainment and a salt works which was less so.

You don't often see one flying.

You don’t often see one flying.

We then had a drive up the coast to Swakopmund and that’s where we stumbled across a third tier, Erongo region second division game at the Swakopmund Sports Centre.

Buffaloes in green were taking on United Stars in white and green. Green is a popular football colour in Africa. I asked around and learned that we had arrived halfway through the second half with Buffaloes leading 3-2.

United Stars clear their lines.

United Stars clear their lines.

There were around a hundred spectators or so lining the pitch. Some had seats on an four level stepped bench, others just sat along the side on whatever was available.

The main stand.

The main stand.

We found a space near to one of the corner flags which gave us a close up view of a linesman with a large square hole in his shorts. I’m surprised that he hadn’t patched it with a FIFA badge. Most of the officials in Africa seem to have one.

View from down the side.

View from down the side.

The standard was better than I expected, although after watching Cowdenbeath play at New Year everything looks decent in comparison. United Stars put the pressure on in the closing minutes but couldn’t get past the Buffaloes goalie.

Twenty-odd minutes after we’d arrived it was all over and we continued into the town centre for some lunch.

 

UNAM FC v Touch and Go, Sunday 8th February 2015, 2pm

March 11, 2015

1 - opening shot

Most of the football teams in the Namibian Premier League are based in Windhoek. That’s not surprising as most Namibians are based in Windhoek. The geographical imbalance meant that Jen and I got the chance to see another game on the Sunday before we headed south in the direction of the Fish River Canyon.

In theory we could have seen two games at the University of Namibia Stadium. There was a match between Rebels and Julinho Sporting Club scheduled for noon followed by the UNAM FC v Touch and Go fixture straight afterwards at two o’clock. We got there at 11:30am only to find the ticket windows unmanned and to be told by a steward that they would open ‘just now’.

View from outside.

View from outside.

‘Just now’ is about as vague as it gets over here. ‘Now now’ is the expression for imminently, whilst ‘just now’ could mean anything from ten minutes to next week.

Forty five minutes later the window opened and we bought our thirty dollar (£1.70) tickets. The latest advice was that a game would start at half past twelve and this was backed up by the information on the ticket. It’s a shame that nobody had mentioned it to the newspapers.

3 - ticket

The stand appeared to have been constructed from chipboard, but at least it had a roof. I was prepared to risk it disintegrating to get a bit of shade though. There weren’t many people in there early on but the crowd swelled to around a hundred or so eventually.

Perhaps someone had been expecting more people to turn up as there were a dozen baton wielding security men lining the gravel running track. Still, I suppose you never know what japes students will get up to next.

View across the chipboard stand.

View across the chipboard stand.

Half past twelve came and went without any sign of the players. Eventually the UNAM team appeared for a warm-up with the obligatory university team nickname ‘Clever Boys’ on their training tops.

The game finally started at two o’clock, which I suppose is just as the newspaper stated. It was the cancellation of the noon game beforehand and the misinformation about the actual start time that was so frustrating. We could have stayed at the cricket had we known that nothing would happen until mid-afternoon.

View to the right.

View to the right.

UNAM were in white with red shorts whilst Touch and Go were in yellow and maroon hoops. Anyway, Touch and Go? Who would name a team something like that? Jimmy Savile?

View to the left.

View to the left.

The pitch was in poor condition, although I suppose the Namibian climatic combination of strong sunshine and infrequent but heavy rain isn’t really conducive to a Wembley standard pitch. Maybe the university should offer a groundsman degree and get those students to spend their days looking after the grass.

Early action.

Early action.

Watching the two o’clock game hadn’t really been in our plans as we needed to get on the road, but there was no way that I was going to hang around for two and a half hours without seeing some football and so we stayed for the first fifteen minutes. Nothing worth mentioning happened and we left with the game goalless. I checked afterwards and and learned that Touch and Go had won three-nil.

 

Namibia v Easterns, Sunday 8th February 2015, 10am

March 9, 2015

1 - opening shot

Whilst the scheduling of football in Africa leaves a lot to be desired with frequent venue and timing changes, cricket is far more reliable. If a game is listed as taking place then it generally does unless, as everywhere, the weather intervenes.

With that in mind I was pleased to see that our stay in Windhoek coincided with a fifty over provincial game between Namibia and the South African side, Easterns. It’s a little odd to see a country competing with regional sides but I suppose it’s similar to Scotland taking part in the one day competitions against the English counties.

As we left our hotel we spotted a couple of Himba kids in the car park. It seems that the market where their mothers flash their jugs is a seven days a week affair. I’d seen the kids in the shopping centre the previous day, wandering around barefoot and wearing nothing more than a string around the waist. I dare say at the ages of three or four they wouldn’t be too bothered about it, but I suspect that they might become a little more self-conscious as they got older.

Himba kids.

Himba kids.

The Wanderers stadium was easy enough to find and after having our car searched we made our way in and parked just behind the scoreboard. I looked the place up on the internet and an England XI had played a couple of one day games against Namibia there in 2004. The first of them being Kevin Pieterson‘s debut for an English representative side.

Play should have started at half past nine, but whilst the players were all milling around, the game had yet to begin. The only action was provided by a kid in a Barcelona away strip using a cricket net as a football goal. Those shirts get everywhere.

Barca kid.

Barca kid.

Jen and I took seats in the shade in front of a bar. As play started we were joined  by two couples, each consisting of a woman reading a magazine and a man compiling his own scorecard. One of the fellas got so infuriated by the inaccuracy of the scoreboard that he left his seat and altered it himself.

There was also a woman sat by herself with an early morning lager. “I love cricket” she told us as she lit another Chesterfield.

View from our seats.

View from our seats.

She wasn’t the only one starting early as there were a handful of people in the bar watching a T20 game on the telly. I imagine the main benefit of being indoors was the air-conditioning.

We’d been to an Easterns game a couple of weeks earlier and in an equally empty venue had sat near to their wicketkeeper‘s Mam. She wasn’t there for this game but I still kept an eye out for her boy, hoping that he’d do okay.

View from the other side.

View from the other side.

We couldn’t stay all day as we had a football game with a noon kick-off to get to, but we watched the first twenty overs or so, Namibia getting to around seventy for two by the time we left them to it.

 

 

Citizens v Blue Waters, Saturday 7th February 2015, 3.45pm

February 27, 2015

1 - citizens v blue waters

The second of the four matches billed to take place at the Sam Nujoma Stadium featured Windhoek’s Citizens against Blue Waters from Walvis Bay on the west coast. As we had nothing planned for the afternoon and it would have been madness to give up seats in the shade, Jen and I decided to stay where we were for a second ninety minutes of football.

Most of the spectators from the first game remained in their seats too and we were joined by a handful of new arrivals. I’ve no idea if they were fans of the two teams, although I’ve an inkling that most were just looking for a way to idle away an hour and a half.

The view to our right.

The view to our right.

A glance around the remainder of the stadium revealed security that struck me as being a little over the top for the circumstances. In the far corner I could see a guard patrolling the perimeter fence whilst twirling a baton. I couldn’t really imagine that anyone would be so desperate to get in for free that he’d be forced to clock them one.

Even if anyone did manage to evade security, they would still have to contend with a moat. A moat! What next? Cauldrons of boiling oil? In reality the moat did nothing more than make the lives of the ball boys even more of a misery that the thirty odd degree heat warranted. I’m convinced one or two of the smaller ones will still be stuck at the bottom of it.

This one looked like he'd had enough.

This one looked like he’d had enough.

Citizens were in yellow and blue whilst Blue Waters sported an all white kit. I noticed that both keepers were wearing number sixteen shirts. Is this some sort of trend? I remember Bartez wearing sixteen, so maybe he started it off.  I wouldn’t have thought that the former France goalie was famous enough for lads in Namibia to want to emulate him. Maybe he’s been cleaning out his loft and sending his old shirts to Africa.

Blue Waters opened the scoring a few minutes in when a ball that was pulled back into the six yard box was turned into his own net by a Citizens defender.

The physio was more glamorous than they usually are.

The physio was more glamorous than they usually are.

The equaliser came shortly before half time when a Citizen’s midfielder waltzed through the away defence and planted the ball beyond one of the Bartezes. He didn’t celebrate though, preferring instead to quickly gather the ball and sprint back to the centre circle as if his team were three goals down.

I can only presume that being level was somewhat of an embarrassment to the hosts and that by this stage of the game they had expected to be a few goals ahead.

Five minutes later Citizens took the lead that they regarded as their right after someone hit the post and then tucked away the rebound. They allowed themselves a celebration on this occasion.

Meanwhile, the big hole hadn't got any bigger.

Meanwhile, the big hole in the terracing hadn’t got any bigger.

At half time I had a wander into the lower tier of our stand and was surprised to see another hundred fans or so, although I had no idea which, if either, of the teams they were supporting.

Blue Waters made it two each not long after the restart, squeezing the ball from a tight angle between the other Bartez and his near post. That was it in terms of goals, although we did get a red card in the final few minutes when one of the visiting defenders said something to the referee that I suspect he may have later regretted.

Jen and I decided against staying for a third game as it was time for something to eat and drink. Just as well really, as when I checked the papers the next day the other two games listed didn’t take place. I wasn’t at all surprised.

 

 

Civics v Eleven Arrows, Saturday 7th February 2015, 1.15pm

February 24, 2015

1-P1200513

Last year I booked flights and hotels in Morocco to coincide with the final week of the African Cup of Nations. As you may remember, the Moroccan authorities were less than enthusiastic about the prospect of thousand of visitors at the height of the Ebola outbreak and so they decided to just sack the whole thing off.

CAF moved the tournament to Equatorial Guinea despite having previously booted them out of the competition for fielding ineligible players. It’s a country that I only became aware of  as a consequence of Mark Thatcher’s role in an attempted coup ten years or so ago. According to him, he initially thought he was funding an air ambulance rather than a crack team of mercenaries.  Easy mistake to make I suppose, if I drop a pound in a collecting tin I never check where it ends up.

I doubt I’ve given Equatorial Guinea a thought since then and whilst coup-worthy it may be, but it didn’t look like an ideal holiday destination. We changed our plans and headed for Namibia instead.

The trip began with a couple of nights in Windhoek where we picked up a Toyota Landcruiser from a local car hire place. I don’t think they realised that we had accommodation booked as there was enough gear loaded into the back to enable us to be self-sufficient for a month. Not only that, but we had a tent on the roof. I’m not sure which animals it was intended to provide an escape from, but it would have made us a nice height for a giraffe attack.

It would probably have flapped about a bit.

It would probably have flapped about a bit.

There was a market outside of our hotel where some of the stalls were run by Himba women. You might have heard of them, they are the ones who wander around Namibia with their knockers out and mud smeared all over them.

They managed to sell me far more tat than they’d have done if they’d kept their shirts on so it’s a worthwhile sales ploy, although I can’t imagine it catching on at Stockton Market. Mind you, there are probably some hipster parts of London where locals dress like that when nipping out on their penny farthing for a bowl of coco pops.

I didn't know where to look.

I didn’t know where to look.

I’d been checking out the football fixtures in the days prior to our arrival but they were being changed even more frequently than those in South Africa. It’s a constant source of irritation to find dates and venues switched a day or two before the game or even cancelled without any notice. I used to think we had it bad in England with Sky dictating changes six weeks or so before matches but I’d happily settle for that these days.

The latest mishap to hit Namibian football was the temporary closure of the Independence Stadium in Windhoek. That resulted in the cancelling of a game to which I had collected tickets just that morning and a subsequent reshuffling of the fixtures that, according to the press, would mean four back-to-back Saturday games at the Sam Nujoma stadium.

Watching four games in a row is a bit much even for me, but I was hoping that the heavy schedule would increase the chances of at least one of them actually happening. Jen and I found the stadium easily enough, although it took us a while to find the way in. The tickets cost thirty Namibian dollars, which is around £1.70. Not bad for a proposed four games.

The ticket office and turnstile.

The ticket office and turnstile.

One of the first things we noticed was a big hole in the concrete terracing opposite. I’d read about it in the paper that morning and the blame had been placed on heavy rain. The Namibian FA got a bit narky as well when questioned about it and whilst if I’d have been their press officer I wouldn’t have been able to resist telling the media that “We are looking into it”, the real spokesman went into a rant about journalists publishing negative stories. Maybe he had a point.  In a town full of nudey women there are better things to focus on.

It must have been some rainstorm.

It must have been some rainstorm.

Not surprisingly there weren’t any fans on the side of the ground with the hole. Actually there weren’t many more in the main covered stand where we were. It was early days though and with potentially four games over the next eight hours perhaps people were pacing themselves.

View from the VIP seats.

View from the VIP seats.

So, the game. Eleven Arrows, in a yellow strip with a very eighties pinstripe, opened the scoring after ten minutes. The Civics keeper chose to let a free-kick floated in to him to bounce off his chest rather than catching it and a somewhat surprised striker headed it straight back past him.

The away lead lasted only until a Civics fella found himself unmarked at the away back post and planted his header into an empty net. The subsequent double somersault celebration was far more impressive than the finish.

The score stayed level until five minutes from time when Eleven Arrows clinched victory with the third headed goal of the game. It was another floated free-kick into the box, but this time a striker got his head on it before the keeper had a chance to chest it out.

Goalmouth action.

Goalmouth action.

Events concluded with an Arrows sub taking so long to tie up his socks that the ref blew for full-time before he could get on to the pitch. He still ran on to join in the celebrations and post-match huddle as if he hadn’t spent the afternoon with his feet up on the bench. I was hoping he’d get Man of the Match. It’s likely he was hoping so too.

For what it’s worth the result was of little consequence, with both teams drifting in mid-table.

 

South Africa ‘A‘ v England Lions, Saturday 31st January 2015, 10am

February 22, 2015

1-opening shot

I’d hoped to get along to see England’s development side in one of their four day ‘Tests‘ earlier in their tour, but the dates didn’t quite fall right. That left the one day games and Potchefstroom on a Saturday worked just fine.

Potchefstroom is about two and a half hours by car from where we live and an easy drive along the road to Kimberley. We arrived half an hour or so before the start and were surprised to see the streets lined with people already cooking on their braais.

I wondered if there was something else going on, perhaps a popular road race or their annual ‘Braai on the pavement‘ day, as it seemed unlikely that everyone would be interested in a South Africa ‘A‘ cricket game. I’ve been to test matches over here where the ground was only ten per cent full.

We parked just outside of the main entrance to Senwes Park and were very kindly given a couple of complimentaries by the people ahead of us on the way in. Despite it being close to the scheduled starting time of ten, very few other people were bothering to make their way inside and we had our pick of the seats in the covered stand.

The sky was dark enough to make immediate play seem unlikely. It brightened intermittently with the occasional flash of lightning, but rain seemed imminent. It was a pleasant surprise therefore when the players took the field at a quarter past ten.

View from the covered stand.

View from the covered stand.

There were still very few people in the ground. One or two on the grass embankment, a couple of groups in the executive boxes and maybe a dozen alongside us in the main stand. As it wasn’t really the weather for a braai, it was difficult to understand why people were choosing to hang around outside by the side of the road.

View from further around.

View from further around.

I was temporarily distracted by a bird hanging from the roof. The zoom lens showed that it had fishing line wrapped around a leg and it was suspended a few inches below a beam. Every now and then it would try to fly away, only to be pulled up as the line halted its progress.

It would probably have taken a fire engine or cherry picker to have rescued it and as that was unlikely to happen a quickish death was about the best that could be hoped for.

There wasn't really anything we could do.

There wasn’t really anything we could do.

I can’t remember who won the toss, but England fielded. We had an over from Mark Wood and then two balls from the recently arrived addition to the squad, Tim Bresnan.

Not much of a workout for Bresnan.

Not much of a workout for Bresnan.

At that point the rain came down and the players returned to their dressing rooms. I wondered how it would affect the braais outside and whether we’d see an influx of spectators hoping to shelter under the roof or whether everyone would just clear off home. It turned out to be the latter.

Not the best of weather.

Not the best of weather.

The rain eased off after an hour, which allowed some kids in the family area to get their own game going, but  it had been so torrential that a further hour on it was still being collected by the sponge roller car.

The most action we saw all day.

The most action we saw all day.

At the point when play looked like it might be possible the rain started again. It wasn’t as heavy as earlier but the cumulative effect combined with time running out proved sufficient to bring the day to a close and play was abandoned at half past two.

We’d seen eight balls in four and a half hours, although that was eight balls more than most of the people who had been braaing since before breakfast.

 

 

Easterns v Free State, Sunday 25th January 2015, 9.30am

February 20, 2015

1-opening shot

I’d been meaning to get to Willowmoore Park for a while and the opportunity cropped up when a Sunday morning departure from the farm we’d being staying at meant that we could pop along and see the second innings of a one day provincial game between Easterns and Free State.

It had been a fairly poor weekend for wildlife. The last time we’d stayed at Kohande we’d stalked baboons through the woods. This time though we had to be content with a few assorted boks. They are okay, but a poor consolation when you know that there are monkeys around.

Big horned bok.

Big horned bok.

Benoni turned out to be a bleak place, or at least it did on a gray Sunday with shop shutters down, rubbish blowing along the street and everyone else having somewhere better to be. We found Willowmoore Park easily enough and had our pick of the car park spaces. If we’d wanted we could have taken any of the spots reserved for the big bosses of South African cricket.

The car park wasn’t the only place with plenty of space and with the exception of the players balcony we had the choice of just about any seat in the ground. We settled for the President’s Suite which we shared with the only other inhabitant, the Easterns wicketkeeper’s mother. Maybe she was also the President, but if she was she hadn’t made use of her parking space.

View from the President's Suite

View from the President’s Suite

Easterns fifty over score of two hundred and seventeen for seven didn’t look to be too taxing a target for Free State. If anything was going to scupper their efforts then it was probably going to be the weather. I left Jen and Mrs Bula in the seats outside of the President’s Suite and took the opportunity to have a look around whilst I could.

At the far end of the ground there were another three or four pitches, with games taking place on two of them. These were more traditional efforts with the players in whites and some even wearing the sort of cap that I haven’t seen since my cub scout days.

Just like the olden days

Just like the olden days

When the rain began falling we relocated to the main stand. It probably has a name but I haven’t bothered looking for it. It’s old though, probably the oldest part of the ground, although at some point plastic seats had been added to it. There were a couple of members of the ground staff and a player’s girlfriend sat towards the back, but apart from them we had it to ourselves.

Denis Compton scored three hundred at this ground on an MCC tour in 1948. It only took him a minute over three hours and ended up as his highest first class score. I tried to imagine how the surroundings would have looked then and assumed that the main stand would have been there, without the seats, but not much elsewhere around the perimeter. There would maybe have been a wooden scorers box and board and, I suspect, a lot more spectators.

The old stand.

The old stand.

The rain got heavier and further play became unlikely. We waited for an hour an a half but realistically nothing else apart from the odd inspection was going to happen. The Free State score of sixty two for three off twelve overs wasn’t enough to allow a result and so the match was abandoned.

 

 

Durban Warriors v Gqikazi All Stars, Saturday 17th January 2015, 2pm

February 17, 2015

1 opening shot

There’s not much football going on in South Africa at the moment. The top two divisions are taking a break in the run up to the African Cup of Nations and so I planned a trip to Durban to coincide with the quarter finals of the reserve league‘s Multi-Choice Diski Challenge. I know, but you have to be somewhere. However, as soon as I’d booked the flights and hotel, the South African FA decided to move the fixtures back a fortnight. Thanks fellas.

Fortunately I’m getting more familiar with the regional third tier games in the ABC Motsephe League and I worked out that we could get along to the Durban Warriors v Gqikazi All Stars clash at the practice pitch next to the Moses Mabhida stadium.

We very nearly didn’t get to Durban at all. Jen had picked up an expired passport instead of her current one and we didn’t discover the mistake until we were about to board. It wasn’t as if it had recently expired either, no, it ran out in 1989. Not only that, but it wasn’t even in the name on her ticket.

We thought that rather than just head for home we might as well try to get on the flight and even though Jen drew their attention to the situation, they surprisingly had little interest and were happy for us to board. Result. We were off to the seaside. Hopefully with equally lax security on the way back.

The view from the hotel balcony.

The view from the hotel balcony.

The game wasn’t until the afternoon and so we took the opportunity to spend a couple of hours in the morning wandering around the Kenneth Stainbank Nature Reserve. They have a few marked hiking trails and we just about got around them all. As a bonus, they had monkeys, which is almost always a good thing.

The zebras were easier to photograph.

The zebras were easier to photograph.

After lunch we set off for the Moses Mabhida stadium. We’d been before, for last year’s Nedbank Cup final, and it’s one of my favourite modern grounds. The arch is a bit of a gimmick but it fits well with the opening at one end and if you approach from that direction it’s an impressive sight.

We struggled to find the practice pitch at first and none of the people around the stadium had any idea of its existence, never mind its whereabouts. Eventually, after plenty of back tracking we spotted it in the distance. It has to be three hundred yards from the main stadium and associating them seems tenuous at best to me.

It's a decent backdrop.

It’s a decent backdrop.

All the wandering around meant that we that we missed the first twenty minutes of the game including an opening goal for the home side. We caught the equaliser as we were arriving though, albeit from about fifty yards down the road.

It would be a push to describe the practice pitch as a ‘stadium’ as three sides had nothing more than a fence. On the fourth was a building that presumably housed the changing rooms and the lawn mower, but had nothing more for spectators other than a single bench seat running along part of its length.

I suppose you could call it the main stand.

I suppose you could call it the main stand.

There were around fifty people watching and the only available seating was next to the three subs for the away team. That was good enough for us and allowed us to observe their manager at close range. He didn’t issue much in the way of advice to his team, perhaps because his movements were restricted by his Stoke City away shirt that was a good few sizes too small.

Durban Warriors were in green with a Spar supermarket logo that I imagine might have scuppered a few shirt sales, whilst Gqikazi wore yellow. There weren’t any further goals in the first half and when the whistle blew for the break we considerately moved away from the subs bench in case any of the players wanted to sit down.

Meanwhile, on the pitch...

Meanwhile, on the pitch…

Nothing of note happened in the second half until a quarter of an hour before the end when the home number ten hit a shot from thirty yards out and close to the right touchline. Or at least I think it was the number ten. It was hard to tell as he was instantly mobbed by his team-mates after a shot that was far too fast and high for the keeper dipped at the last moment to graze both crossbar and upright on its way into the top corner.

Fantastic. It was one of those goals that reminds you of exactly why we bother going to the match. Everyone jumped in the air, including, I suspect, a few who weren’t even supporting Durban. Whatever else was going on in the world was momentarily eclipsed.

View from down the side.

View from down the side.

Durban almost added a third at the death when one of their strikers chested down a cross field pass and stroked it past the keeper from close range. It wasn’t to be though, as the trigger happy lino had his flag up even before it reached the net. I was pleased in a way as that second goal deserved to be the last word.

Just in case any of you were worried, Durban airport was just as relaxed about out of date passports in the wrong name as Johannesburg was and so we made it home without any fuss.

Cowdenbeath v Raith Rovers, Saturday 3rd January 2015, 3pm

January 25, 2015

6 - refreshments at central park

Twenty years ago I worked in Cowdenbeath. I didn’t live there though. Of course not. Why would I when Edinburgh was just a short drive away? Every morning I’d head north over the Forth Bridge against the flow of traffic that was coming in to Edinburgh and then in the evening I’d make the return journey after work. As you might have expected my social life was much better than it would have been in Fife and I suppose the only downside that I can recall is that I never made it along to Central Park to see Cowdenbeath play.

Twenty years on, Jen and I were up in Edinburgh for a couple of days and so I decided to put matters right. Our hotel was a five-minute walk from Waverley station and the trains run from there every half hour or so to Cowdenbeath.

The journey was brightened by the sight of a young lad opposite me swigging Buckfast from the bottle. Never mind Iron-Bru or deep-fried Mars Bars, can you get any more Scottish than that?

A post-lunch aperitif.

A post-lunch aperitif.

It took me forty minutes to get to Cowdenbeath as the train stops a good few times on the way there. It’s a pleasant journey though with decent views as you cross the Forth.

View from the train window.

View from the train window.

I followed the crowd out of the station, or at least half a dozen or so of those that were heading for the game. It’s only a few minutes walk to Central Park, down to the High Street and then across to the other side. I asked a steward where I would buy a ticket and after checking that I wasn’t a Raith fan, he directed me straight to the turnstile. He then spoiled the good impression that he’d made by asking me if I was an old age pensioner. Charming.

I’ve no idea how much pensioners are charged but it was sixteen quid for me. That seemed expensive for Cowdenbeath, but I keep forgetting that they are now a Championship team, the same league as Rangers, Hearts and Hibs. I also keep forgetting how expensive things are in the UK.

Pay on the gate.

Pay on the gate.

I‘d paid over a quid for a bag of crisps at the motorway services a few days earlier. Not much over, a pound and five pence, but more than a quid nevertheless for a normal sized bag of crisps. In fact, that’s a guinea. At the risk of sounding old, I’ll repeat it. A guinea for a single packet of cheese and onion crisps! I’m beginning to think that maybe the steward had good grounds for thinking I was a pensioner.

Central Park has two stands, both next to each other along one side of the pitch. Whilst I’d have been okay with sitting down, the sun was shining directly into those seats and so I made my way across to the terracing on the opposite side.

View from the terracing.

View from the terracing.

The first thing that I noticed was that my view was obscured by a large fence. There’s a racing track around the edge of the pitch which, if I remember rightly from my Cowdenbeath days, caters for stock car racing. I suppose if wheels are going to be flying off the old bangers you probably would be grateful for the protection.

There was a tea hut at the back of the terrace and I bought a coffee and a scotch pie. I’m never really sure what goes into a scotch pie, perhaps I’m better off not knowing. It was okay though, once a layer of gravy had been added.

Cowdenbeath fans in front of the tea hut.

Cowdenbeath fans in front of the tea hut.

The Raith Rovers fans had the end to my left and around two hundred and fifty of them had made the ten-mile journey. That’s pretty poor in my book at the time of year when I reckon most people are gagging to get out of the house.

It didn’t take long for the visiting fans to sing the “Cowden Family” song, although it was different to the version attributed to East Fife. The lyrics to that one draw attention to the suspect personal hygiene and lack of electrical appliances in Cowdenbeath. The Raith effort is a wee bit darker, focusing more on inter-breeding and incestuous desires. Perhaps it needs codifying into a standardised multi-verse ditty.

Cowdenbeath were in blue.

Cowdenbeath were in blue.

The standard of football was as poor as I can ever remember seeing. If a martian had turned up to escape the Christmas telly I doubt that he’d have had any idea that the object of the exercise was to try to direct the ball into the nets at each end of the field.

It was as if a group of people were just running around randomly, occasionally colliding with each other before looking down at their feet, discovering a football and then kicking it in the manner that you would a stone in the street.

With the sun going down I moved to the newer of the two stands for the second half. The game didn’t look any better from that side though and the nearest that anyone got to scoring was when a big Cowdenbeath defender sliced the ball towards his own goal, forcing his keeper to tip it over the bar.

View from the seats.

View from the seats.

I cleared off five minutes from time to save myself a further half hour wait for a train. As I reached the station I could hear the Raith fans singing a lot louder than they had been for most of the game. Sure enough I’d missed an 89th minute winner.

I might pop back in another twenty years time in the hope of seeing a goal for myself. I’ll probably not mind being asked if I’m a pensioner then.

 

 

Blackburn Rovers v Middlesbrough, Sunday 28th December 2014, 3pm

January 15, 2015

1 - opening shot

Blackburn is usually a pretty good away day. It’s not too far from Teesside and tickets tend to be either cheap or plentiful. Sometimes both. This year had the potential to be one of the best, with it falling between Christmas and New Year and Blackburn offering us seven thousand tickets.

Jen and I were in the UK on holiday and as we had to stay somewhere we thought we may as well make it near Blackburn for the night. If I’d had a look as to where our hotel at Mellor was located I’d probably have gone across to the M6 and arrived from that direction, but as I hadn’t paid attention we ended up on the M62 and had to drive through Blackburn and then out of the other side.

Jen has less enthusiasm for watching football at close to zero temperatures than I do and so I left her at the hotel and took a taxi to Ewood Park to meet up with my son Tom and his mates. The Indian fella who was driving me had more interest in cricket than football but was intrigued to hear about the Hero Indian Super League football that I’d seen on telly a couple of weeks earlier, particularly when I mentioned that Tendulkar was in the crowd. Or more accurately, an executive box.

Jack Walker statue.

Jack Walker statue.

There’s a fanzone area near to the Jack Walker statue where you can watch the early game on a big screen whilst having a beer. I imagine it’s quite handy for the smokers who like to get to the ground early.

It wasn’t really a day for standing outside though and we gambled that the concourse inside would be a little warmer. As kick-off approached there was a minute‘s applause for all the Blackburn fans who had died in the previous year. As we stood and clapped, dozens of photographs were flashed up on the big screens, each of a different fan who had passed away in 2014. It’s no wonder there were so many empty seats in the home stands. Living in Lancashire doesn’t seem to come with much of a life expectancy.

It was full in our end though, with the entire seven thousand allocation having been sold. There was a decent atmosphere too, with the heartwarming sound of pensioners and small children alike singing their hearts out to “…they play in red and white, and they’re fuckin’ dynamite…”

Boro fans at Ewood.

Boro fans at Ewood.

Karanka had made a few changes to the Boxing Day line-up, but we’ve got a decent squad and I’d like to think that being able to rest players whilst still being competitive will benefit us later in the season. Whitehead at right back seemed an unusual choice, but I’m not going to be overly critical.

Some late action

Some late action

It was one of those days when it didn’t quite go our way. You could say we were unlucky not to take the three points as Kike and Bamford both hit the woodwork in quick succession, but on the other hand Leadbitter cleared one off our line right at the end. So, we could have won and we could have lost. A draw was probably about right.