Archive for April, 2025

Easington Colliery Welfare v Shotton Comrades, Sunday 30th March 2025, 10.30am

April 10, 2025

This was a good day. I popped around to my Mam’s early on and then took in a Sunday league game. The afternoon was spent arseing around in the garden whilst the dog chomped on a bone that consisted of most of a cow’s pelvis. In the evening Jen and I called into the Sun Inn where I had a couple of pints of banked Bass before moving on to the Social Club, which is probably better described as upstairs at KU Bar, to see John Bramwell.

There wasn’t a big crowd, but everyone sat quietly and listened whilst he ran through a mix of really old stuff, Kloot standards and some of his recent Harmonic Orchestra songs. It was the first of three Bramwell gigs over the next two and a half weeks.

The Sunday league game was in the Peterlee and District Premier Division and at Memorial Park, Easington. It’s the pitch next to the Colliery Welfare ground, which was the first place I saw a proper football game back in the autumn of 1973. There was a game going on simultaneously to the match I was watching, but I decided to ignore it and focus on my original choice.

Easington Colliery Welfare were taking on Shotton Comrades in a top versus bottom of the table clash. It was a cold but sunny morning and as I stood and looked across the pitch towards the sea, it made me appreciate how good it is to be in England in the Spring and that there’s beauty in what might be considered some of the less likely North East of England locations.

Easington were in blue and white with Shotton in a maroon and black kit. There were around thirty spectators, mainly older blokes, perhaps keen to get out of the house. A couple of WAGs sat on the grass near to the Shotton subs and coaches and there were a few younger blokes on the far side who had already cracked open the lager cans.

The difference between top and bottom of the table was noticeable with a steady flow of goals from Easington. It was a good-natured game though and Shotton kept their heads up. Their keeper had a decent game, and the final score could easily have been a lot higher without his efforts.

With fifteen minutes to go, and after having a discreet word with the captains, the ref blew for full-time early. Thirteen-one was enough, I suppose, and it freed up some time for those heading off for Mother’s Day activities.

Middlesbrough v Oxford United, Saturday 29th March 2025, 3pm

April 9, 2025

As we approach the business end of the season the visit of relegation threatened Oxford had to provide three points if we were to stay in the play-off hunt.

Jen and I had been to see Boo Hewerdine at Coulby Newham cathedral the night before and I was chatting with Col, an old school-friend. He was a Darlo fan as a kid but is more into ice-hockey these days. He had little faith in the Boro’s prospects of reaching the play-offs and even less confidence that we’d get promoted at the expense of whichever of the top three teams misses out on automatic. He’s probably right, but you’ve got to enjoy the chase whilst it’s still on.

The gig had good acoustics and a well-behaved crowd. Bonus point for the cushions that softened the effect of the wooden pews.

On the morning of the game, I nipped up to Declan Carroll’s stables at Malton to see Hickton, our syndicate horse. Most of the other fellas don’t bother with the stable visits and this time there was only Graham and I. Hickton is a friendly enough horse and likes to have his head stroked. Declan reckons that he’s progressing well, and he has an entry for Redcar early in April.

On this occasion, we drove up to the gallops to see him work with a couple of sprinters. They used the starting blocks and then had a stiff gallop for four uphill furlongs. He was sharply out of the stalls and ran well, keeping up with the faster horses before taking a bit of pulling up. If he doesn’t run well next time, it won’t be for a lack of fitness.

The Boro’s fitness was improving too, with regular centre-half Rav van den Berg making the bench. He got on for the final few minutes, so should now be available for selection. We’d been poor in the first half and went in at the break a goal down. At that stage, it looked as if Col had got it spot on in his play-off prediction.

We kept at it in the second half, with Howson holding everything together from deep. Iheanacho equalised with his first goal for the club and hopefully that will boost his confidence. It’s a loan that seems more in his interest than ours but if he hits form then it might pay off.

The winner, ten minutes from time, was a glorious build up full of flicks and backheels with the final one coming from Borges as he steered it home. It was the sort of move that you’d expect if you were five goals to the good rather than desperately needing a winner as time slips away for keeping your season alive.

The win took us to seventh, with only goal difference keeping us out of the play-off spots. Seven games to go and a Wembley trip is still a possibility.

Ryburn United v Marsden, Thursday 27th March 2025, 7.30pm

April 8, 2025

This game was in Woodlesford, near Leeds, and with the exception of a car on fire on the hard shoulder, it was an uneventful drive south. I’d done nothing of note leading up to this game and so in an effort to make this mildly interesting, I’ll pad it out by relating how I fed a crow from my hand on the way back from Glasgow, two days previously.

Jen and I had stopped at a services and taken our food and drink to a picnic table outside. There were a couple of crows hopping about and so I threw them a few bits of my pasty. I wondered if I could get one of the birds to sit on the table and so I put the food there instead. That all went well and we progressed to me holding the food in my hand and the crow taking it from my palm. It was happy to do so.

I’ve read that crows are highly intelligent and have great memories, including being able to recognise individual people. I’ll be in his good books now after his chorizo and cheddar pastry snack and if I ever get a puncture on the M74 I should be able to rely upon him and his mates for some assistance.

The game was a Yorkshire Amateur League Cup Semi Final and played at the neutral venue of the West Riding County FA. I’ve not really any idea of where the teams sit in the pyramid, but the ground provided a good venue for the fixture. A lot of the crowd appeared to be mates of the players and many had come straight from work.

There was a three-row covered stand that ran alongside the pitch, although as everyone simply stood in front of it, at the railing, there was no chance of seeing any action from the seats. At each end of the seated section were standing areas that provided a better view. The playing surface was artificial, and with a higher bounce than you tend to see these days. It almost caught out the Ryburn keeper early on, but he scrambled back to claw the ball off the line.

The game was evenly contested until we approached half-time and Ryburn scored three times in seven minutes. The Marsden players left the pitch shell-shocked, whilst I got some chips from the food hut.

As I sat on a bench outside of the clubhouse, I could hear the shouted recriminations from the Marsden dressing room as they rued their failure to keep things tight and see out the first half.

The teams returned, with Marsden believing that the next goal would be critical. It was, but unfortunately it went against them and within a minute of the restart. Despite being four down, they continued to press forward and had some decent chances before driving one into the top corner for a consolation and the best goal of the night.

Any flicker of hope was fully extinguished on the hour when a Ryburn corner bounced twice without being cleared and was nodded in at the back post. The remaining half-hour was played out with less intensity, other than when a couple of players sought to settle old scores by leaving a foot in.

Ryburn missed a penalty before adding a sixth goal to book their place in the final. I encountered no fires or crows on the drive home.

Scotland v Greece, Sunday 23rd March 2025, 5pm

April 6, 2025

This trip started off with a booking for a Boo Hewerdine gig and then expanded to take in a game and go for a walk. The gig was at a pub called The Doublet in Glasgow and took place in an upstairs room with a capacity of around thirty people. The band was Hotel Art, which is a duo made up of Boo Hewerdine and a Slovakian bloke half his age. We tend to see Boo quite often and I think the Hotel Art songs are the best he’s done for a while. Perhaps it’s like when you have an old dog and then you get a puppy which gives it a new lease of life.

The walk was on the West Highland Way. I had no idea that a national trail would start so close to Glasgow, but I suppose one of the good things about the UK is that you are never too far from the countryside. We walked north from Milngavie, covering about ten miles in total, along a route that was well enough signposted for us not to have to worry about getting lost.

I don’t suppose highland cattle count as wildlife, so the highlight was seeing a hawk. Or something like a hawk. I’ve no idea really what it was but it didn’t look like something that small rodents would feel comfortable being around. It was initially sat in a field and then, on seeing us, it flew into some trees. Next time we are up in Glasgow, we’ll pick up the trail where we left off and see how far we get by doing it in sections.

I hadn’t intended to go to the Scotland game at Hampden Park. I’d been there before and so would usually have selected a game at a new ground. However, I’d hatched a cunning plan to try and make getting tournament tickets easier by signing Paul and I up to the Scottish Supporters Club. We’d collect points by attending games and on the off chance that Scotland ever qualified for another tournament, we’d be in pole position for Tartan Army tickets.

The trip was with Jen, rather than Paul, so Jen had to attend the game to accrue Paul’s point. She much prefers small fixtures to sell outs in national stadiums but was happy to come along. We walked from our hotel on the other side of the river, passing the old Third Lanark ground. It looks as if there is some construction work going on, perhaps the installation of an artificial pitch. I look forward to seeing a game there someday, ideally from the old overgrown terracing.

The highlight of the game for Jen was a macaroni pie. Mac and cheese is seen as a ‘side’ in the US, so the peculiarly scotch experience of eating it in a pie was a welcome novelty. I doubt it will catch on stateside, or even south of Berwick, but I enjoyed it. Next time I might opt for the traditional scotch pie or a donner meat pie. Yes, really. A recent DNA test revealed that I’m 39% Scottish and maybe that explains why I’ve a tendency to eat such delicacies.

The game was pish, as us part-Bravehearts say. Scotland held a one goal advantage from the first leg but were soon two down on the day and a third Greece goal seconds after the break put the outcome beyond doubt. My main interest was in seeing how the Boro’s Tommy Conway did. He was only given the last fifteen minutes but put the effort in and was always looking to be available for a pass. As we accumulate our Tartan Army points I’d hope that he gets more time on the pitch.

The stadium was just about empty by full-time and most of those fans who had remained had done so only to have the opportunity of booing Steve Clarke and his players. It was a little odd pretending to care who won when chatting with the people sat around me, but who knows, maybe I’ll develop an affinity with them. If not, then I’ll just have to go for the pies.

Annfield Plain v Durham United, Saturday 22nd March 2025, 2.30pm

April 5, 2025

It was international week and so this day had been designated ‘Non-League Day’. I’m not sure who makes these designations, but it does seem as if every day has some cause attached to it. Some of them are worth celebrating, Steak and BJ day for example, although if I were a cow I might think differently. I’m also happy to observe ‘Non-League Day’ as often as possible and so Jen and I headed north to Derwent Park for the eleventh tier Wearside League Premier Division fixture between Annfield Plain and Durham United.

The previous night we’d been to see Pete Doherty at Arc in Stockton. He put on a very good show after initially joining each of his three support acts and then being accompanied on stage at various times by his wife, toddler and dog. He had some fanatical followers in the crowd that knew every word of every song, but they were countered by the drunken dickheads who paid attention during the choruses of the hits but talked loudly through everything else.

There was nobody operating the turnstile when we arrived at the ground, but a small kid soon turned up to take the three quid gate money. An old bloke then appeared and thanked us for attending before advising us to buy some homemade cake from the tearoom underneath the small, covered stand.

It was likely to be a difficult game for the home side as visitors Durham United had clinched the Premier Division title the previous week. Durham will be playing in the Northern League next season.

There were around fifty spectators present. We found a couple of seats at the back of the stand and put down a sleeping bag for Henry to lie on. He got a fair bit of attention and the official photographer took a snap of him which appeared on the Annfield Plain social media.

Derwent Park looked old. There was some concrete terracing to our right and most of the pitch barriers and perimeter fencing had probably been there for at least sixty years. For the fans around us it was a chance to catch up with their mates. One bloke was telling the fella next to him about how good he had been at darts until dartitis brought his ambitions to a sudden halt. A woman nearby sought advice on how to fix a boiler that was struggling to maintain pressure. Once she’d received an answer that she was happy with, she left early to try it out.

Annfield Plain took an early lead and could easily have gone two up when an effort was ruled offside. It was always going to be Durham’s day though and a flurry of goals in the second half made the game safe before Annfield Plain pulled one back for a four-two final scoreline.

The visitors showboated until the final whistle with one of their players spurning an easy chance to put the ball wide of the keeper in favour of trying to chip him. The ball didn’t drop in time and landed on top of the netting, bringing howls of laughter from his mates in the stand. He justified his effort by claiming that he’d been after something ‘more audacious’.

Durham were presented with the trophy after the game and marked the occasion by spraying some fizz around. We finished our homemade cake, gathered up the dog’s sleeping bag and left them to a well-deserved celebration.